said Harry.
"Er, well, yes," said Lockhart, ripping a life-size poster of himself from
the back of the door as he spoke and starting to roll it up. "Urgent call -
unavoidable - got to go -"
"What about my sister?" said Ron jerkily.
"Well, as to that - most unfortunate -" said Lockhart, avoiding their
eyes as he wrenched open a drawer and started emptying the contents
into a bag. "No one regrets more than I -"
"You"re the Defense Against the Dark Arts teacher!" said Harry.
"You can"t go now! Not with all the Dark stuff going on here!"
"Well - I must say - when I took the job -" Lockhart muttered, now
piling socks on top of his robes. "nothing in the job description - didn"t
expect -"
"You mean you"re running away?" said Harry disbelievingly. "After all
that stuff you did in your books -"
"Books can be misleading," said Lockhart delicately.
"You wrote them!" Harry shouted.
"My dear boy," said Lockhart, straightening up and frowning at Harry.
"Do use your common sense. My books wouldn"t have sold half as
well if people didn"t think Id done all those things. No one wants to
read about some ugly old Armenian warlock, even if he did save a
village from werewolves. He"d look dreadful on the front cover. No
dress sense at all. And the witch who banished the Bandon Banshee
had a harelip. I mean, come on -"
"So you"ve just been taking credit for what a load of other people have
done?" said Harry incredulously.
"Harry, Harry," said Lockhart, shaking his head impatiently, "it"s not
nearly as simple as that. There was work involved. I had
to track these people down. Ask them exactly how they managed to
do what they did. Then I had to put a Memory Charm on them so they
wouldn"t remember doing it. If there"s one thing I pride myself on, it"s
my Memory Charms. No, it"s been a lot of work, Harry. It"s not all
book signings and publicity photos, you know. You want fame, you
have to be prepared for a long hard slog."
He banged the lids of his trunks shut and locked them.
"Let"s see," he said. "I think that"s everything. Yes. Only one thing
left."
He pulled out his wand and turned to them.
"Awfully sorry, boys, but I"ll have to put a Memory Charm on you
now. Can"t have you blabbing my secrets all over the place. Id never
sell another book -"
Harry reached his wand just in time. Lockhart had barely raised his,
when Harry bellowed, "Expelliarmus!"
Lockhart was blasted backward, falling over his trunk; his wand flew
high into the air; Ron caught it, and flung it out of the open window.
"Shouldn"t have let Professor Snape teach us that one," said Harry
furiously, kicking Lockhart"s trunk aside. Lockhart was looking up at
him, feeble once more. Harry was still pointing his wand at him.
"What d"you want me to do?" said Lockhart weakly. "I don"t know
where the Chamber of Secrets is. There"s nothing I can do."
"You"re in luck," said Harry, forcing Lockhart to his feet at wandpoint.
"We think we know where it is. And what"s inside it. Let"s go."
They marched Lockhart out of his office and down the nearest stairs,
along the dark corridor where the messages shone on the wall, to the
door of Moaning Myrtle"s bathroom.
They sent Lockhart in first. Harry was pleased to see that he was
shaking.
Moaning Myrtle was sitting on the tank of the end toilet.
"Oh, it"s you," she said when she saw Harry. "What do you want this
time?"
"To ask you how you died," said Harry.
Myrtle"s whole aspect changed at once. She looked as though she had
never been asked such a flattering question.
"Ooooh, it was dreadful," she said with relish. "It happened right in
here. I died in this very stall. I remember it so well. Id hidden because
Olive Hornby was teasing me about my glasses. The door was locked,
and I was crying, and then I heard somebody come in. They said
something funny. A different language, I think it must have been.
Anyway, what really got me was that it was a boy speaking. So I
unlocked the door, to tell him to go and use his own toilet, and then -"
Myrtle swelled importantly, her face shining. "I died."
"How?"
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